wait..its over?

today is the day... my very last night in college station.

my room looks similar to what i assume my nyc apartment will look like. tiny, and void of anything but a computer, an air mattress and a few bags. i hope it makes it easier to leave tomorrow.

oh yeah, and im officially a hoarder.
nah, that pics not my room, but its a good replica. i think ive kept every note, card, letter or sticky note anyone has ever given me. whats up love language apparently?
i will miss this room...


i leave for haiti in 5 days! WOW. I am literally in disbelief that its here already. I have a ton to do this week, and the Lord is the ONLY thing getting me through it all. a common questions people have been asking of late is "how excited are you for nyu?!" to which i am always thrown off for a bit. life has been moving so rapidly i feel like i can't even get excited about nyu yet, first i h ad to get through finals, then the weddings, then moving, now Haiti, then the cruise...THEN... then i can FINALLY be excited about nyu. i was thinking i would make a trip out there in july to look at apartments but it looks like katie and her dad will be doing that which is great! but i was looking forward to an excuse to go up there...

oh, i also found this t-chart. i have to laugh because i am very much obsessed with t-charts, pros and cons etc. etc. when i am making decisions. i made this the beginning of junior year, in regards to the next summer...

i love that impact wasn't an options. neither was staying at home. ha. guess God all sorts of showed me who was boss. Thanks Dad. its times like that when i can be thankful that no matter how much i think i can screw up your plan...i can't.

so long C.S. its been a good 4 years, i love you lots. be good to my sister these next 4...




-ckm

oh hey grad

I did it!

I'm a former student at Texas A&M University. How bizarre.



So far no emotional breakdowns! Then again, I don't think I've stopped moving until this very second. Graduation was followed by a great trip to Grune, Texas and then to our friend Zach's ranch, which some could argue was well onto the border of Mexico. I spent a night in College Station then boarded a plane (yes, a plane, in Houston) to go to Dallas for my junior year roommate's wedding, and then stayed in Dallas for a few days visiting with my grandma and cousin.

I leave for Haiti in t-minus 9 days.
9 days! That is single digits people.

I feel like it was just yesterday that I was boarding the plane for my first trip, and then praying fervently for an answer of whether or not the Lord was calling me back. Now, here I am, 9 days out.

Of course, Satan has been trying to weeasle his way in like always. Initially I was supposed to be working at a camp here in Texas. I would have been in Tyler for orientation yesterday. There are moments when I face regret, or challenge what I am doing. I get scared and then get angry at myself for not doing the "cooler" thing. But I have to have confidence in the Lord. I know He has me there for a reason!

It came as a great relief on Monday when I read in Proverbs, chapter 20 verse 24 that
"a man's steps are guided by the Lord, how then can anyone understand his own way?"

Of course! What on earth am i even worrying about?

Lord, I apologize. Gosh, I am so royally messed up, how can i sit here and wonder YOUR plans and then think that my silly human ones are better than Yours?

I love summer in Texas. Lots of iced tea, swimming, reading, laughing. I just wish I was doing it with my friends around.Its been a week since I last saw them and I already feel their absence. The inside jokes, the fact that they get my humor ( I realized quickly this weekend that the days of everyone in the room laughing with me are pretty much over..yikes!). I feel blessed by them, I really do. NYU will be hard without their constant companionship.


until next time, when i promise to write less sentimental things....
ckm

last post as a current student.

Well, less than 8 hours.

I have less than 8 hours as a current student at A&M.

It's weird. I go from an extreme high to extreme lows. But I guess that's healthy. i would be worried if I was only sad, or only happy. I tend to be a passionate person, emotions don't come in half doses for me!

It's been great getting to enjoy my friends without schoolwork. To cross things off our bucket list, the one we made the first week of senior year when we should have been studying (senioritis hit some of us early...).

So on Thursday we made our way to the Blue Bell Factory in Brenham.





And then just getting to spend time at our favorite coffee shop, MugWalls, and not having the distraction of studying. Just the simple times of laughter, stories, and of course, the unicorn game.



Its definitely nights like those I'll miss the most. The beautiful College Station sunsets coupled with the soft glow of hte christmas lights and the faint breeze over the tin roof. Realizing we're not as "young" as we used to be, that midnight is the new 2 am.


here's to praying i don't trip tomorrow!
-ckm

ill take a side of emotions with that coffee!

In 48 hours I will have finished my last final.

I will leave Wehner High for the last time and get ready for a new life in le big apple.

i love finding places to study in and around the bryan/college station area. I take great pride in the fact that I discovered the Hampton on 6 2 years ago. Last night we turned the conference room of the Class Center in Koldus into our own personal study spot, compete with my Keirug (which i love btw(. Tonight I'm at Living Hope. It's the ideal study spot, plenty of tables, quiet rooms, free snacks, free coffee and....all the emotions that go along with what this body has meant to me.



If there is any word of advice I could give to the underclassmen believers its this:
get plugged in now.
It is unreal how much true community in a body has changed my PERSONAL walk. I feel so loved, challenged and strengthened by the body around me at living hope. I only wish I would have delved deeper sooner. Young kids, older adults and the super cool young married couples have all made their marks on my life . Many days Living HOpe is the one things keeping me from excitement about graduating.

But then I remind myself, this is a time to be JOYFUL and THANKFUL. The Lord blessed me with mentors, teaching and community that I can now seek after as a model as I go out into the world. I am now aware that this type of body CAN and should exist, Lord please give me the courage to pursue this type of fellowship wherever I am!

I could literally go on forever about Living Hope, I really could. But I'm sure I will write more about it in the future.

ISo with that being said, please pray that in the next few weeks I can find joy and not sorrow. Help me to celebrate my time in College Station, and to not mourn in the retirement of this part of my life.

Music at the moment is the Bethan Dillon and Matt Hammit version of "In Christ Alone." My forever favorite worship song, one that means so much. Ch-ch check it out!


-ckm